going home

yeah yeah age 6 racer

2005-04-19T05:37:00.000-07:00

this is too much
too much of a time in my life
too much saddness
too much darkness
just too much
im closing the mothafucka down
and jumping ship
http://suchgreat.blogspot.com
itll be political, but no too political
be gentle, its a baby
oh, and the name thing? just call and ask
much love
<3

call for a quickie

2005-04-01T05:35:00.000-08:00

i havent posted in like a million years (or a month... whatever)
and this isnt going to be long
if your reading this i probobly love you
i havent called you im probobly busy (or your in montana)
if you havent read the revolutionary worker on the terri schiavo case (Http://www.rwor.org) or sunsara taylors blogging (http://sunsara.blogspot.com) then you probobly (no... you just dont) dont know whats up
and i dont know what the fuck i want to do with this blog. its sort of sappy poetry, semi-coherent ramblings, with some literature and politcs thrown in. so im open to suggestion.

<3

2 years later, march 5, another world is possible

2005-03-05T03:43:00.000-08:00

2 years later
from the day
my life changed
i remember
hundreds... flooding into the streets
people getting grabbed
and the war starting
bob avakian.... without state power all is illiusion

on march 5, 2003 thousands of youth all around the world said NO to the war on iraq
thoundands of high school and college students waled out of class to say NO... we stand with the people of the world... this war is not in our name

on march 5, 2003 4o students walked out of avon lake high school
joined hundreds in downtown cleveland

we joined a movement that dared to challenge the cource of this country and its imperial warpath... a juggernaut of war and fascism
we dared to dream.. that another world was possible

and its not over....
we will change the cource of history

the battle for the future is on!

seriously... check out bob avakian... check out the revolutionary communist party... and a vision of a whole diffrent future... resist
another world is possible
another world is possible
another world is possible

and we pledge to make it real

welcome home

2005-02-28T06:28:00.000-08:00

welcome home...
i need you so much closer
this is short
but come
come
come
come closer
build another world
build something diffrent
with me
build
build
build
with me
where im from
we live like its the latest
attraction

for the life of me

2005-02-15T03:42:00.000-08:00

...i cant believe we'd ever die for these sins...

i dont believe in purity standards
for friends or anyone else

i dont believe in gods

im just learning

and i still believe in love and rock and roll

and im sorry
for everyone
and everything

no day but today

Arthur Miller- in loving memory

2005-02-12T04:16:00.000-08:00

The world lost a fabulous, original, and provactive voice today.
Arthur Miller
in loving memory
thanks
"We never told the truth for ten minutes in this house"
-from death of a salesman

on the 9

2005-02-11T02:24:00.000-08:00

i wrote it.. on the number 9 bus... get it?

it seems as if this whole city is crying

dark and abandoned
inside and outside

devoid of meaning
buildings and tags;
faces and lives

lost on wheels
lost in bibles

drowning and abandoned

the concrete plans of millionaires
call forth death

solitary poet
depressed and self-righteous

churches with broken stained glass
hospitals
all scream death

gray construction
mimics faces, which imitate lives

windows only give dark companionship
and no solace

like our slow death
in this dead city

a thought

2005-01-31T05:01:00.000-08:00

look

i find some of what you teach suspect
because
im used to relying on
intelect

but

i try
to open up
to what i dont know

because

reason
says
i should have died
three years ago

theres only us
theres only this
forget regret
or life is yours to miss
no other cource
no other way

no day but today

reading list

2005-01-31T03:44:00.000-08:00
some really good shit ive been reading, recently read
first mad props to insight motherfucking press!
for li onesto- dispatches from the peoples war in nepal and
bob avakian- from ike to mao and beyond: my journey from mainstream america to revolutionary communist

also been read/reading recently of note
jane austin- pride and prejudece
f. scott fitzgerald- the beautiful and damned
esther kaplan- mothers in the fatherland
barbra ehrenreich- nickel and damned

on the horrizon
anne bronte- the tennenet of wildfill hall (i think i butchered that spelling, but who has to google these things)
cornel west- democracy matters
whatever nabokov eszti gives me next
and excitingly in march
bob avakian and bill martin- marxism and the call of the furture

read....
http://www.rwor.org

come.closer

2005-01-18T20:32:00.000-08:00
come.come closer
no.no stay further away
forget about me
about us
come.come closer
no.no stay further away
stay out of my dreams
stay out of my house
come.come closer
no.no stay further away
i never forgot
never stopped thinking
come.come closer
no.no stay further away
get you smell off me
get your taste off my lips
come.come closer
no.no stay further away
take the dreams
take the tears
come.come closer
no.no stay further away
i hate you
i love you
its over
its only just begun
come.come closer
no.no stay further away

lets make this moment a crime

2005-01-03T12:09:00.000-08:00
lolita and euchre
cs lewis and snow patorl
i guess this is a new year
i guess im older now
someone forgot to send me the manual
on growing up
on being 19 and 20
and then 21
stuck in words and games
a sonnet would be
preferable
but i think i drink to much for that
dylan only wrote freeverse
i dont think anything else
would make me any
number
lets all share our dreams
under a communist moon

never,never

2004-12-28T02:32:00.000-08:00
im so sorry
im so sorry
im not that kind of boy
the perfect one
with the red wine on the pier
or the home cooked meal
i used to feel like i was stuck on the wrong side of town
now i feel like im stuck on the wrong side of town
but some things have changed
and some things haven't
but i need to stop drinking
go home and
make everything a little bit better
everything ive said has been wrong
everything ive thought has been wrong
and now ill im left with is well
this
repetition
i pore it all out for this screen
and it only feels like my life
maybe a little more crimson will get me
through the night
or a slight bit more repitition
will get me through the day

christmas

2004-12-17T02:22:00.000-08:00
im not celebrating christmas this year
i read the headline
i know that you want to pump your icon
all over my world
im not celebrating christmas this year
i cant pretend that everythings going to be okay
with people like you in power
im not celebrating christmas this year
cause youll sing songs of peace
while you bomb entire cities
and im not celebrating christmas this year
because i wont join you in celebration
of your holiday of the birth of your religion
you front like you want peace and moral values
youre hollow and empty all your moral values
are
genocidal to people like me
and you tell me merry christmas
im not celebrating christmas this year
and ill fucking die before you people win

a private moment

2004-12-11T17:57:00.000-08:00
im so dirty
on the inside
and the outside
im getting too old
for the old games
that we play
that are supposed to numb everything
but just dredge up everything
like black oil from the ground
oh no
its the black from my soul
maybe its not like that
but everything seems
so
out.of.control
and theres little
to hold on
and little worth
holding on for
and nothing
no nothing
no no nothing
is right

incense and peppermints, insomnia and canada

2004-12-07T02:58:00.001-08:00
and that night
when i heard
i didnt know what to say
except that it was a mirror
to my own life
its the kind of life
that
shouldnt hurt this much
god damned much
and still does
cause
that lame ryhme
was the best ill ever get
and my god damned arms
are like the tree
that lovers carved
wen they wanted to tell everyone
how much they cared
that was before he hit her
for the first time
and on the other side
they two knew
how much they loved each other
before she was raped
and he dropped out
and they cut down the tree anyway
but my scars wont disappear
like that lost forest
and my feeling
on that night you told me

does she ever get the girl?

2004-11-30T05:30:00.000-08:00
why dont you believe me
when i tell you
that guys like me
realy arent for girls like you
cause girls like you
got bigger things ahead of them
guys like me hide in closets
and close the door
and live only for the
next day cause
we dont see no future
and girls like you
got a whole world in front of them
and girls like you
can take trash
and make art and guys like me
can only make trash like this
and
poets only end up as
old drunkerds anyway
and girl you got wings
you gotta look hard enough
and these closed off spaces
and suffecating moments
you can leave in the dust
cause girls like you
have so much more to live for
then guys like me

no day but today

too much

2004-11-24T04:27:00.000-08:00
remember that night-
when you told me
that i drink too much
and i smoke too much
well didnt i tell you?
dont you remember what wordsworth said
the world is too much
with us
and it hurts
so much
cause there aint enough
to make it okay
cause its always gonna be
too much
so if i drink too much
or i smoke too much
and yeah
if it hurts too much
or i love you
too much
dont forget what i told you
that night
remember what wordsworth said
cause the world is
too much

my muse

2004-11-22T23:11:00.000-08:00
my father abbandoned me
sometime after he abandoned himself
i have no freinds except you
and
im so afraid
like this bottle your dark
like my flag your red
like my arms
you are crimson
cause i never knew love
until i met you
and your that good kind
thats everybody tells me is so bad
but i know you
my muse
i know you
but you know me
better than i know myself
my muse
cause were in the dark together
and pain never felt better
and everything
is
crimson
just like you
my muse

cut my wrists and black my eyes

2004-11-19T13:29:00.000-08:00
a swirl of thoughts
a million words

i feel used
this isnt right
we have to save this fucked up planet
thanks for coming

and one of those three in the morning nights
with the god damned book for the 9th time
it hurts every time i read it
some nights i feel infininate
but most i just cry

we accept the love we think we deserve

the world...

2004-11-16T10:55:00.000-08:00
the world belongs to us
dont believe me?
well the world belongs to us
cause theres billions of us
and only a few of them
and from falluja
to hiroshima
from dresdon
to ohio
they act like they own the worold
and they do
but theres billions of us
and only a few of them
billions, have never taken it lying down
from chiapes to falluja
from nepal to peru
and even in ohio
the world belongs to us
in gaza and rammalah
kaffiah, gun, and rock
is shaping the future
and falluja is not alone
baghad
sammara
all of iraq can not be tamed
with guns and planes and thousands of soldiers
do you get it yet?
the world belongs to us
look in nepal
where 70 percent is ours
started with two guns
and peasents have lands
and the sisters are free
get it now?
cause they got big guns
and bigger weapons yet
religion
empire
democracy
but guess what
the world belongs to us
cause theres billion of us
and only a few of them

just for fun

2004-11-15T20:12:00.000-08:00
i only do surveys i take from eszti.... heres this

-last word you said: you
-last song you sang: some random get up kids song
-last thing you laughed at: your mom
-last time you cried: today
.PRESENT.
-what's in your cd player: in the car is a bob avakian talk (bobavakian.net) in the bedroom is mineral
-what color socks are you wearing: argyle, duh!
-what's under your bed: nothing, i dont use a frame
-what time did you wake up today: sometime after i was supposed to be in class
.FUTURE.
-what is your career going to be: getting paid for reading books?
-where are you going to live: fuck if i know, i do <3 ny but who knows
-how many kids do you want: none.. but i want to be an uncle
-what kind of car will you drive: something hot and little
.CURRENT.
-current hair: scandanivan blonde, but kind of dirty just got it cut so its sort of pre-shag with just enough product
-current clothes: argyles, chucks, low rise jeans cuffed, hoodie, tight black tee shirt, jean jacked
-current jewelry: friendship bracelet
-current annoyance: lack of alcohal
-current smell: glacier bay and smoke
-current longing: true love... obviously
-current desktop picture: the revolutionary internatinalist movement logo- a world breaking through chains
-current favorite music artist: hawthorne heights
-current book: the real life of sebastian knight- nabokov, collapse of the 2nd internatinal-lenin
-current worry: skrilla
-current hate: bush
-story behind your username: indian maoist gurriallas, look it up on the internet
-current favorite article of clothing: scarves
-one person you wish was here right now: jacqueline
-line from the last thing you wrote to someone: they suck
-i am happiest when: coffee.cigarettes.books.demonstrations.making out
-i feel lonely when: right now
-favorite authors: joyce, dylan thomas, mao, steinbeck, bob avakian, sallinger,
-do you think too much: you cant
-if you could live anywhere in the world, where: rolpa, neapl
-famous person you have met: some obscure communists i think are really cool, the dude from piebald, the smashing pumpkins
-do you have any regrets: 'forget regret, or life is yours to miss'
-sex or love: love... but deffinetly both
-favorite coffee: good... black dark and bitter... but that doesnt mean bad
-favorite smell: nag champra, glacier bay, cigarette, bree
-what makes you mad: imperialist fucks
-favorite way to waste time: driving
-what is your best quality: my body!
-are you currently in love/lust: jesse hudnutt is lust... im not in love with anyone persay
-what's the craziest thing you have ever done: there was jail, and drinking and driving in high school, some random sexcapeds
-any bad habits: smoking, which i love...
-do you find it hard to trust people: it's not hard, it's just that i dont' do it much.
-last thing you bought yourself: coffee
-bath or shower: shower for the love of god i love showers
-favorite season: summer
-favorite color: pink, red, black (hows that for indicision)
-favorite time of day: whenever night begines
-gold or silver: silver
-any secret crushes: do i have secrets? who the fuck doesn
.FASHION.
-how many coats and jackets do you own: lots and lots
-do you wear a watch: no, but i wouldnt mind one htough
-favorite pants color: grey jeans
-most expensive item of clothing: i have some dressier things from keneth cole, like a jacket... that may be it
-most treasured: great jeans
.YOUR FRIENDS.
-do your friends know you: a few
-what do they tend to be like: gay, pretty, liberal, and from the westside
-can you count on them: most of the time
-can they count on you: some of the time
.LAST.
-last book you read: yeats sellected poems
-last movie you saw: half of enemy of the state (i live with a fucking film buff)
-last movie you saw on the big screen: jesus... its been so fucking long i dont remember, coffee and cigarettes i think
-last show you watched on tv: sabrina!
-last song you heard: your no rock and roll fun, sleater kinney
-last thing you ate: chicken
-last time you showered: a few days ago (we onlly have a bath in my apt.)
-last time you smiled: "you have made me smile again, in fact i might be sore from it, its been a while"
-last person you hugged: eszti
-last person you kissed: fake or real?... bastards i dont kiss and tell
-last person you talked to online: mitch
-last person you talked to on the phone: jacqueline
.DO YOU.
-smoke: lots
-do drugs: sometimes
-drink: yes... for love of god yes
-sleep with stuffed animals: not in a few years
-play an instrument: no...
-believe there is life on other planets: its seems likely
-read the newspaper: the motherfuckin revolutionary worker fools
-have any gay or lesbian friends: do i have any non gay or lesbian friends?
-believe in miracles: certailnly not
-consider yourself tolerant: depends
-consider police a friend or foe: foe... deffinetly...deffinetly foe
-like the taste of alchohol: most
-have a favorite stooge: no... umm
-believe in astrology: no, but i read my horescope
-believe in magic: no
-pray: certailnly not
-go to church: not for church
-have any secrets: sure
-have any pets: no
-go or plan to attened college: cleveland state, but my hearts at elmhurst college
-talk to strangers: yeah sure
-have any piercings: not yet
-have any tattoos: i have a few in mind...
-hate yourself: sometimes
-wish on stars: not for serious, but we are stardust
-like your handwriting: have you seen my handwriting?
-believe in witches: no
-believe in ghosts: no
-believe in santa: no
-believe in the easter bunny: this is getting ridiculous
-believe in the tooth fairy: sus
-have a second family: not cohesive
-trust others easily: depends
-sing in the shower: frequently

these never are as much fun as they look
maybe well get a poem tommorw, who knows

the ashtray says...

2004-11-12T15:05:00.000-08:00
you were up all night
530 am
codine
burritos
coffee
nabokov
and anything
anything
to dull the pain
to save me from myself
this warm coffeeshop
aint nothing
like whats inside
me
and last night
the wind snaked through the trees
like the cold down my spine
and the emptiness inside
cause whats in my heart
doesnt match my head
and me feet wont follow
anything
but a throbing electronic beet
that tells them to
run

affirmation

2004-11-07T13:50:00.000-08:00
cold wind
exposed skin
chbosky
moshi moshi
god damn it
faster faster
life doesnt move
life beats
like two hearts lying together
spilled wine
sylvia plath
god damn it
faster faster
lifes moving before i can jump
but
god
damn
it
im gonna live
passion
faster faster
wurthering heights
taught me a lot
about how to live
but more importantly
about how to write life
god damn it
faster faster
so much passion
you hurt your fingers on the keyboard
but thats better than hurting your arm
with a fucking razor
no time to pause there
cause the worlds moving
jump on
god damn it
faster faster
im a poet
god damn it

bread and roses

2004-11-06T13:30:00.000-08:00
lawrence mass
1912
tens of thousands of women textile workers go on strike
to demand fair wages and better hours
safe working conditions
overtime pay
an end to child labor
they are brutally attacked
housed firebombed
children harrased
leaders jailed
two young women carried a banner
"we want bread yes, but roses too"
and aint that the truth
and aint that what our lives need to be
but aint that god damned hard
cause its always good films
and bizzare hookups
redwine and degrassi
the format and old d/c records
joni mitchell told me to be a free man in paris
bertolucci painted it on the screen
fitgerald touched my soul with it
its always been going_home
but now i just want to leave
they told me to live like its the latest attraction
but i do it hiden in a closet and a corner
where no one can see inside of me
tyring to finding an escape
go back down back to my sweet home
but god damn it
red wine and sex and books
wont change the fucking world
but neither will bread alone
bread and roses
bread and roses

your first stalker

2004-11-01T21:21:00.000-08:00
we've had a million moments
no not a million
525600
to be precise
'cause thats how i measure my life
and your voice made me giddy like a school girl
as much as i miss how it was
i know it wont be like that again
but i just want to be part of your life
i need you to be a part of my life
you might be doing fine without me
but im not doing fine without you
the prettiest girl, to enter this dump. she drank all of the whisky
but she left the rum, and tonight ill take what i can get
ill be a little creapy, i am getting old
and i think thats why ive learned some things
that brought me back to you

making out
long drives
brown eyes
guys the just dont quite fit in
dishing the dirt on the whole class
talking the big smack
playing the fool
wearing all of the latest fashions
bucking the new trends
wearing your old threads
coffee in the evenings
waiting through all of your bad bad days just to end them with someone you care about
dreaming of things so impossible

i still love it all
i think you do to

if they steal the election....

2004-11-01T21:17:00.000-08:00
no buisness as usual!
a single spark can start a prarie fire!

another fucking november

2004-11-01T13:55:00.000-08:00
more freeverse style
old and new tracks
kind of like my arm
sometimes you gotta say
no more
and even though
this place is a prison
you gotta ground yourself in reality
and dream of things
so impossible
like chicago... and mystery
im still missing you
i wont forget anything
we too are stardust

im not going to write about her

2004-10-30T22:51:00.000-07:00
fuck it...
sometimes
eucure is all you need when-
break-
you dont have no direction-
and-
you need something really big
and-
you fall in love-
pause-
and it really is what you need-
cause-
the world is crashing down
and the drugs dont work-
break-
and fuck it
you cant do that shit to yourself no more
cause books, and people, and music- in a word beauty really really are truth like that urn said so long ago, cause sometimes the world isn't too much with us-
catch-
and the romantics just make you giggle

for manic and for depression

2004-10-29T13:09:00.000-07:00
some things get all better
and some things just get worse
cause some things change
and some things dont
and
chicago
sounds real good right about now
but i still hate making decisions
without
you
well as for now i'm gonna hear the sadddest songs and sit alone and wonder how you're making out...

come on babe, why dont we paint the town....

again for her, she wont read it anyway

2004-10-25T09:55:00.000-07:00
When we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted,
To sever for years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this!

The dew of the morning
Sunk chill on my brow;
It felt like the warning
Of what I feel now.
Thy vows are all broken,
And light is thy fame:
I hear thy name spoken
And share in its shame.

They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shudder comes o'er me -
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee
Who knew thee too well:
Long, long shall I rue thee
Too deeply to tell.

In secret we met:
In silence I grieve
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee? -
With silence and tears.

once more

2004-10-24T18:28:00.000-07:00

dont feel bad for me
i want you to know
deep in the cell of my heart
i really want to go
there is another world
there is a better world
there must be
there must be
im crying
its rather embaresing
cause im in public
but that song always makes me cry
and the smoke gets in my eye
and the scars tissue up
neopsporins no good
when uncle bic comes to town again
nothing is sacred
this place is a prison

id be happy to die for a taste of what angel had

2004-10-19T11:39:00.000-07:00
i dont know where to start or where to end
this is supposed to be a spiral
but it feels like a sick fucking circle
back there and here
nothing productive
kept btl
but i cant stop thinking of you
i read the whole fucking thing
again
for like the fourth time
all the way through
and so much that made me smile
and giggle like schoolgirl
but then

"Last night was devoted to nostalgia. I spent a majority of the night/early morning crying by myself, sorting through boxes and boxes of pictures. It was like I was slowly tourturing myself with memories. The more I sorted through, the harder it was for me to stop. The notes you wrote. The tapes you made. The flowers you sent. Every sticker you ever stuck. I saved them. I kept them. All of them. Until last night. I threw away memories with each letter and balloon and every fake fucking picture with your stupid fucking smile. I burned them out of my life with every stick of incense I lit. I hate the fact that you can manage to make me feel this way after five months have gone by. I devoted two years of my life to you. Two whole years. The only thing I got out of it was a bag of trash and a profound hatred for anyone around who happens to be happier than I am. Fake. Fake, fake, fake. You make me sick. You make me hate myself and everyone else. With the exception of you. But she's no exception. She is the worst of all. I hate her because she stole you away from me. From us. I hate her because she's you and you're her and because you two embody everything that we made fun of for those two years.

I don't care how pathetic and disgusting this makes me look, but I have to get it out there. So you know. So I know. I'm admitting defeat. You fucking ripped me to shreds. "

i cant believe it ever went down like that
i cant believe it
i cant believe anything anymore

i cant stop thinking about you

this place is a prison

tell all your friends

2004-10-17T13:32:00.000-07:00
your never gonna know
your never gonna read this
your never gonna know,
how often i think about you
your never gonna know
what it feels like
to be alone- to be alone without you
and its sounds creepy
but its not like that
and you used to know, exactly what it was like
cause your never gonna know
how many times ive cried
cause your never gonna know
well wait
i wont blame it on him
its not him
its me and you
and lets face up to that
but cause your never gonna know
how much i love you
ill forgive it all
just call

more on growing up

2004-10-11T22:30:00.000-07:00
two
zero
it seems unreal
but its been 3 months already
the words are still ringin
'youth's the most unfaithfull mistress'
and its like it was the other night
bob avakians on film again
and im tryin to work
and the monsters and critics
can't hold my intrest
cause i gotta tell you
i can't stop thinking
growing up
it wasn't supposed to be like this
we were supposed to be together
and we were supposed to stay 18 forever
but with lofts and redwine and byron and keats
and of cource
bob avakian
but its just more coffee
and more cigarettes
and beowulf
im gonna stay 18 forever

sweaters and books and coffee and cigarettes and death cab

2004-10-04T13:42:00.000-07:00
another fall
same old fucking planet
another world-
-possible??
i still feel the same way
isnt this supposed to be growing up?

everyday is like sunday

2004-09-19T10:50:00.000-07:00
cold coffee mornings
330 partys
worlds colliding- in a good way
gay west siders
east siders who will change the world
bob avakian on film
the cold hurts to much
but i still love both
and the fire- is still burning

fun and games

2004-09-15T10:28:00.000-07:00
this is just self-indulgance, but what can i say, im an english major =)
Bold the novels you've read, italicize the ones you've read part(s) of:

Achebe, Chinua - Things Fall Apart
Agee, James - A Death in the Family
Atwood, Margaret - The Handmaid's Tale
Auel, Jane M. - Clan Of The Cave Bear
Austen, Jane - Pride and Prejudice
Babbitt, Natalie - Tuck Everlasting
Baldwin, James - Go Tell It on the Mountain
Beckett, Samuel - Waiting for Godot
Bellow, Saul - The Adventures of Augie March
Brontë, Charlotte - Jane Eyre
Brontë, Emily - Wuthering Heights
Burnett, Frances Hodgson - The Secret Garden
Camus, Albert - The Stranger
Cather, Willa - Death Comes for the Archbishop
Chaucer, Geoffrey - The Canterbury Tales
Chekhov, Anton - The Cherry Orchard
Chopin, Kate - The Awakening
Conrad, Joseph - Heart of Darkness
Cooper, James Fenimore - The Last of the Mohicans
Crane, Stephen - The Red Badge of Courage
Dahl, Roald - The BFG
Dahl, Roald - The Twits
Dahl, Roald - The Witches
Dante - Inferno
de Cervantes, Miguel - Don Quixote (el Ingenioso Don Quijote de La Mancha)
Defoe, Daniel - Robinson Crusoe
Dickens, Charles - A Tale of Two Cities
Dostoyevsky, Fyodor - Crime and Punishment
Douglass, Frederick - Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass
Doyle, Sir Arthur Conan - The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
Dreiser, Theodore - An American Tragedy
Dumas, Alexandre - The Three Musketeers
Eliot, George - The Mill on the Floss
Ellison, Ralph - Invisible Man
Emerson, Ralph Waldo - Selected Essays
Faulkner, William - As I Lay Dying
Faulkner, William - The Sound and the Fury
Fielding, Henry - Tom Jones
Fitzgerald, F. Scott - The Great Gatsby
Flaubert, Gustave - Madame Bovary
Ford, Ford Madox - The Good Soldier
Goethe, Johann Wolfgang von - Faust
Golding, William - Lord of the Flies
Hansberry Lorraine - A Raisin In The Sun
Hardy, Thomas - Tess of the d'Urbervilles
Hawthorne, Nathaniel - The Scarlet Letter
Heller, Joseph - Catch 22
Hemingway, Ernest - A Farewell to Arms
Hemingway, Ernest - The Sun Also Rises
Homer - The Iliad
Homer - The Odyssey
Hugo, Victor - The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Hurston, Zora Neale - Their Eyes Were Watching God
Huxley, Aldous - Brave New World
Ibsen, Henrik - A Doll's House
James, Henry - The Portrait of a Lady
James, Henry - The Turn of the Screw
Jester, Norton - The Phantom Tollbooth
Joyce, James - A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Kafka, Franz - The Metamorphosis
Kingston, Maxine Hong - The Woman Warrior
Lee, Harper - To Kill a Mockingbird
L'Engle, Madeline - A Wrinkle in Time
Leroux, Gaston - The Phantom of the Opera
Lewis, CS - The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe
Lewis, Sinclair - Babbitt
London, Jack - The Call of the Wild
Mann, Thomas - The Magic Mountain
Marquez, Gabriel García - One Hundred Years of Solitude (Cien anos de soledad)
Melville, Herman - Bartleby the Scrivener
Melville, Herman - Moby Dick
Miller, Arthur - The Crucible
Milton, John - Paradise Lost
Mitchell, Margaret - Gone With The Wind
Moliere - Tartuffe
Montgomery, LM - Anne Of Green Gables
Morrison, Toni – Beloved
Morrison, Toni - Song of Solomon
Nabokov, Vladimir - Lolita
O'Brien, Robert C. - Mrs. Frisby And The Rats Of NIMH
O'Connor, Flannery - A Good Man is Hard to Find
O'Neill, Eugene - Long Day's Journey into Night
Orwell, George - 1984
Orwell, George - Animal Farm
Pasternak, Boris - Doctor Zhivago
Plath, Sylvia - The Bell Jar
Poe, Edgar Allan - Selected Tales
Proust, Marcel - Swann's Way
Pynchon, Thomas - The Crying of Lot 49
Remarque, Erich Maria - All Quiet on the Western Front
Rostand, Edmond - Cyrano de Bergerac
Roth, Henry - Call It Sleep
Sachar, Louis - Holes
Salinger, J.D. - The Catcher in the Rye
Shakespeare, William - A Midsummer Night's Dream
Shakespeare, William - Hamlet
Shakespeare, William – Macbeth
Shakespeare, William - Romeo and Juliet
Shakespeare, William - Taming of the Shrew
Shaw, George Bernard - Pygmalion
Shelley, Mary - Frankenstein
Silko, Leslie Marmon - Ceremony
Simon, Neil - The Good Doctor
Smith, Robert Kimmel - Chocolate Fever
Solzhenitsyn, Alexander - One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich
Sophocles - Antigone
Sophocles - Oedipus Rex
Steinbeck, John - The Grapes of Wrath
Steinbeck, John - East of Eden
Stevenson, Robert Louis - Treasure Island
Stowe, Harriet Beecher - Uncle Tom's Cabin
Swift, Jonathan - Gulliver's Travels
Tan, Amy - The Joy Luck Club
Thackeray, William - Vanity Fair
Thoreau, Henry David - Walden
Tolstoy, Leo - War and Peace
Turgenev, Ivan - Fathers and Sons
Twain, Mark - The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
Voltaire - Candide
Vonnegut, Kurt Jr. - Slaughterhouse-Five
Walker, Alice - The Color Purple
Wharton, Edith - The House of Mirth
Welty, Eudora - Collected Stories
Whitman, Walt - Leaves of Grass
Wilde, Oscar - The Picture of Dorian Gray
Wilder, Laura Ingalls - Little House on the Prairie
Williams, Tennessee - A Streetcar Named Desire
Williams, Tennessee - The Glass Menagerie
Woolf, Virginia - To the Lighthouse
Wright, Richard - Native Son

Random thoughts- that realy wasnt as much fun as i thought it would be. some of those werent novels in the first place (shakespeare, williams, anybodys collected stories), and some of it was just filth.

no time no mood

2004-09-13T22:58:00.000-07:00
it doesnt matter what time
nor what mood
this keyboard is mine
all the time
because i pore it out
for no one at all
this free verse style- all my own
that belongs to the world
cause theres no time
and ive got no mood
but im here
all the same
write.... write... write...
to stay alive
to survive
keep the fires burning
"To put it another way, there's nothing about the present order of things in the world that's tolerable to me. It's completely intolerable. I can't stand it. And I don't want to make my peace with it, I don't want to find a way to make it within that world, or to try to make it. I don't want to be part of the established order. I don't want to turn a blind eye and pretend I don't see what I do see. I don't want to stand on top of the rubble of broken bodies and the suffering and destruction that this system brings down on people and never look down and see what I'm standing on while I'm stuffing my face. That doesn't hold any attraction for me; I'm repulsed by the idea of that and I just have no interest in doing that."
- Bob Avakian

tell me why

2004-09-13T02:49:00.000-07:00
i still cant deal with this
why does the music make me feel the same way
but the people dont
how come i can still dream of things
so impossible
but they dont ever happen
and how come their not here
but i still am
tell me why
neil young still makes me cry
but you dont
the only fire i have left
is the only one that matters

fresh like dead leaves

2004-08-12T16:21:00.000-07:00
something new... something fresh, in a dead season
the green is turning to the autum crunch
and new york falling back to cleveland
coffee and cigarettes fallin back to textbook
cause the flannery o'conner so-co summer
is droppin- no falling, to a neil young cry all the way home postal service season
but were here- you and me
and two worlds are colliding, as we live our lives
the new rome getting ready for their november second
so it may be teer jerkin denim jacket season
but we got a world to win